Source: Mohanji’s personal blog
Everybody has potential. Everyone craves it. Everyone gets it at some point in their lives. Everyone cannot maintain it. Everyone suffers from the lack of it. Everyone misses it. This is the story of elegance.
Intellect is integrally attached to elegance. It gets reflected in one’s thoughts, words and actions. Being elegant is an art. This cannot be pretentious. Pretentious elegance cannot be maintained. It becomes situational. Many celebrities are victims of it. They often become terribly disillusioned when they cannot bridge the gap between the fake and the real. They fall to self-destructive abuse and even death. All the tantrums they display are usually expressions of their deep insecurities. These are clear signs of their not coming to terms with themselves and their acquired status. Status can be acquired but not stature. Stature has to happen. It needs eligibility. It needs grounding. Stature happens with increase in awareness. It needs deeper awareness of the thread that runs between status and activities performed each day; the thread that runs between the man and the mission. The thread that unites everything to the place of action and the thread that keeps the beads of events and life together. Being with the thread, being totally aware, will reflect maturity, groundedness or even elegance.
Elegance can be nurtured and for that intellect should be in command at all times. When intellect is in command, there will be no excesses. Everything will be in moderation.
Elegance cannot be acquired from outside. It has to happen inside, with the right attitude of flexibility. Situational elegance can be termed as pretension or even a facade. Elegance through time and space needs equanimity and clear understanding of the role play of life. It can even be called a spiritual and social maturity. Elegance never permits complaints of any kind. It is a clear understanding as to what happens, why it happens and for whom it happens. The purpose is clear. Even if the purpose is not clear, there is no resistance to the events of life. There is only management of everyday matters as they appear, while keeping the boat of equanimity steady. Elegant acceptance of reality as it is, makes a man irresistible.
Elegance has nothing to do with habits. It is not dependent on whether a man is a gambler, alcoholic or a womanizer. These traits if left uncontrolled could lead to his downfall, but they do not affect his elegance, per se. If weaknesses bind him, they pull him down. If he is socially compatible, it usually shows his nature of flexibility. Elegance does not mean compromising or conforming to every whim of society. Elegance is in accepting realities and living it in style. A non-conformist could also be totally elegant. Elegance has nothing to do with social morality either, though social acceptance does help in life. If someone compromises too much to be socially acceptable, he cannot be considered as elegant.
Any activity that provokes and maintains weakness of any kind is never to be entertained. Every habit can be termed as weakness. Every emotion can be termed as weakness. Notions, knowledge and understanding can also lead to weakness. Operating tools such as mind and intellect can lead to weakness of character. Elegance is in independence. Elegance is in existing in freedom within. Elegance is in flowing with life. Elegance is in not stagnating, physically, mentally and intellectually.
The factors that pull a man down are primarily his own constitution such as the state of mind, thought processes, fears and phobias, dependency on other people and dependency on time, space or an activity. Any dependency can bring forth weakness.
Truth is something that stirs your being. It gets reflected in the mind. Elegance is basing oneself on the real truth beyond dualities. This makes man fearless. Elegance is fearlessness. Man exists on earth based on relative truths. This de-stabilizes his mind and confuses his existence. When he shifts to the absolute truth, to the very thread that gets reflected as beads, he attains equanimity. He attains elegance.
Once this is attained, nobody can pull him down. Nothing can affect him anymore. He will start seeing through the ups and downs of life in perfect equanimity. The stature that is based on absoluteness of existence creates spontaneous equanimity. In order to achieve that, witness-hood is necessary. Witnessing one’s thoughts, words and actions without emotions will lead to power over them. This is not situational power. This is perpetual power. That power can take one above mundane existence to absolute beingness.
Elegance exists through happiness and sorrow, time, space and situations. It is a perpetual state. It is a state of no excesses. It is perfection in existence. It never sways the mind. It never gets affected by people, places or events. Elegance is a perpetual state. It is beingness.
When no good or bad events affect a personality, when nothing can adversely affect a personality, when the operating level is based on equanimity, that person has transcended the mundane existence. That one has liberated himself.
Elegance can be consciously nurtured when daily life is handled only by the intellect and never by emotions. When intellect rules, man has no regrets. Lack of guilt and regrets help maintain elegance. When emotions rule, it gives room for all negative emotions. That leads to downfalls. Emotion only creates regrets and dissatisfaction. It can never give perpetual fulfillment.
Emotions lead to temporary pleasures which cannot be termed as absolute fulfillment. The fulfillments that a person experiences out of emotions are usually temporary. It leads from emotion to emotion with decreasing levels of satisfaction and eventually, it tires the person into disillusionment.
Elegance happens as wisdom increases. When awareness enhances wisdom, equanimity takes place. That leads to elegance in lifestyle. All true masters have consistently displayed extraordinary elegance, even if some of them lead a life of a fakir or a beggar on the street. Their elegance was unmistakable. If you digest the lives of saints well, you will see the underlying elegance displayed beyond time and space and even through death. Lack of dependency allows absolute elegance.
Where does elegance come from? Equanimity. Equanimity happens out of Awareness. When you are clearly aware of the temporariness of your thoughts, words, actions and even your existence on earth, the mind becomes silent. Mind stops jumping from tree to tree of desires. Mind keeps quiet.
Less desire leads to better equanimity and balance in existence. This never takes away the pleasures of life; instead, you will better enjoy the fruits of existence without the mental barriers and expectations. This will help better enjoyment of life because the pressure for pleasure is less. When the mind stops pushing man for pleasure, whatever is available is more enjoyable. Otherwise, comparisons and corresponding dissatisfaction, prevent all pleasures of existence.
Elegance is attractive. It transcends beauty, power, money, position or status. The inner stability reflected through the life of purpose brings forth irresistibility. An elegant man becomes irresistible to society. He becomes an icon. He needs not prove anything. His lifestyle itself becomes his message. It attracts people to him. An elegant personality is highly irresistible.
Elegance springs out of a life managed by intellect instead of emotions.
Elegance needs absolute selflessness. Selflessness in thoughts, words and action keeps a man elegant.
Elegance needs equanimity through time and space.
Elegance cannot be affected by persons, personalities, situations, time or space.
Elegance is beyond the mannerisms or immature states of other people. Nothing can affect an elegant personality or his perpetual elegance.
Elegance is not in dressing up or showing off. It is in handling life elegantly at all times.
Elegant lifestyle is an art and a perpetual expression of how life can be.
Elegance is in inner stability beyond changes of time, space, situations and people.
Elegance is in the ability to see through situations into the thread that runs through time, people, place and personality; and remain unaffected.
Elegance is in being happy irrespective of whether a person, a situation, a dish or a place is available or not.
Elegance is in the discipline of life, not influenced by emotions, time, people or space.
Elegance is absolute objectivity.
Elegance is the ability to keep one’s position absolutely steady against all odds and storms of emotions in life.
Elegance is in conviction and the ability to act accordingly against all odds.
Elegance is in being you through time and space.
Elegance is in being kind, compassionate and non-violent irrespective of time and space.
Elegance is in being elegant. What do people like in a man or a woman? It is not their beauty. It is their elegance. Beauty is transitory. It changes with time. Elegance is permanent. It stays through time. Elegance maintains the beauty of character. Elegance maintains a life of equanimity. Elegance maintains relationships beyond emotions. Elegance enhances you and makes your life complete and satisfied. There are no do’s and don’ts in elegance. It is not in what you do, but, how you do it, that determines elegance. It is your attitude associated with every activity.
Wish You Elegance.